1 00:00:09,586 --> 00:00:09,724 Are you ready, kids? 2 00:00:11,068 --> 00:00:11,206 KIDS: Aye, aye, Captain! 3 00:00:12,482 --> 00:00:12,620 I can't hear you. 4 00:00:14,172 --> 00:00:14,310 [ louder]: Aye, aye, Captain! 5 00:00:15,758 --> 00:00:15,896 ♪ Oh... 6 00:00:19,103 --> 00:00:19,241 ♪ Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? ♪ 7 00:00:21,034 --> 00:00:21,172 ♪ SpongeBob SquarePants!♪ 8 00:00:23,137 --> 00:00:23,275 ♪ Absorbent and yellow and porous is he. ♪ 9 00:00:25,344 --> 00:00:25,482 ♪ SpongeBob SquarePants!♪ 10 00:00:27,206 --> 00:00:27,344 ♪ If nautical nonsense be something you wish... ♪ 11 00:00:29,137 --> 00:00:29,275 ♪ SpongeBob SquarePants!♪ 12 00:00:31,000 --> 00:00:31,137 ♪ Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish. ♪ 13 00:00:33,172 --> 00:00:33,310 ♪ SpongeBob SquarePants!♪ 14 00:00:35,137 --> 00:00:35,275 ♪ Ready? SpongeBob SquarePants! ♪ 15 00:00:36,965 --> 00:00:37,068 ♪ SpongeBob SquarePants! 16 00:00:39,965 --> 00:00:40,068 ♪ SpongeBob SquarePants! 17 00:00:41,275 --> 00:00:41,413 ♪ SpongeBob SquarePants! 18 00:00:43,379 --> 00:00:43,517 [ laughs heartily] 19 00:00:45,931 --> 00:00:46,034 [ plays airy tune] Captioning sponsored by THE U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION 20 00:00:49,206 --> 00:00:49,344 and NICKELODEON 21 00:01:02,586 --> 00:01:02,724 [ "Rule, Britannia" playing, clock bell tolling] 22 00:01:06,827 --> 00:01:06,965 [ alarm beeping] 23 00:01:09,896 --> 00:01:10,000 Wow, I'm really late again. 24 00:01:11,931 --> 00:01:12,034 Maybe they'll finally fire me. 25 00:01:14,172 --> 00:01:14,310 [ laughing] 26 00:01:16,206 --> 00:01:16,344 What? Locked? 27 00:01:17,827 --> 00:01:17,965 SPONGEBOB: This isn't happening. 28 00:01:19,689 --> 00:01:19,827 SpongeBob? 29 00:01:21,241 --> 00:01:21,344 [ knocking head against wall] 30 00:01:22,724 --> 00:01:22,862 The horror-- 31 00:01:23,896 --> 00:01:24,000 it's unspeakable. 32 00:01:25,172 --> 00:01:25,310 Don't you see, Squidward? 33 00:01:27,137 --> 00:01:27,275 It's closed! 34 00:01:28,448 --> 00:01:28,586 The Krusty Krab is closed! 35 00:01:30,275 --> 00:01:30,413 You mean I got out of bed for nothing? 36 00:01:32,310 --> 00:01:32,448 The doors are locked-- 37 00:01:34,137 --> 00:01:34,275 the doors are locked and we are on the outside! 38 00:01:35,896 --> 00:01:36,000 Outsiders. 39 00:01:37,448 --> 00:01:37,586 What are we going to do? 40 00:01:39,206 --> 00:01:39,344 There are Krabby Patties inside all alone. 41 00:01:42,689 --> 00:01:42,827 KRABS: Just stand aside, lad, 42 00:01:44,413 --> 00:01:44,551 and let me unlock the door. 43 00:01:46,551 --> 00:01:46,689 Mr. Krabs, you're here! 44 00:01:48,103 --> 00:01:48,241 Gosh, Mr. Krabs, we were worried 45 00:01:49,827 --> 00:01:49,965 something might have happened to you. 46 00:01:51,965 --> 00:01:52,068 We'd be deprived of the greatest food known to man. 47 00:01:54,896 --> 00:01:55,000 Oh, you made me drop me keys. 48 00:01:56,551 --> 00:01:56,689 Give me some space, lad! 49 00:01:58,034 --> 00:01:58,172 Can't I get a little space?! 50 00:01:59,448 --> 00:01:59,586 I'm sorry, Mr. Krabs. 51 00:02:01,965 --> 00:02:02,068 Harsh. 52 00:02:03,379 --> 00:02:03,517 [ laughing] 53 00:02:04,965 --> 00:02:05,068 Argh! Me back! 54 00:02:06,758 --> 00:02:06,896 Are you hurt, Mr. Krabs? 55 00:02:08,344 --> 00:02:08,482 No, I'm just doubled over in pain 56 00:02:10,517 --> 00:02:10,655 fighting back tears in me eyes because it's a new dance craze! 57 00:02:14,965 --> 00:02:15,068 Oh, I thought you were hurt. 58 00:02:16,310 --> 00:02:16,448 I am hurt, you idiot! 59 00:02:18,620 --> 00:02:18,758 I'm sorry I snapped at you, laddie. 60 00:02:20,758 --> 00:02:20,896 It's just me back is killing me. 61 00:02:22,689 --> 00:02:22,827 It's me old lumpy mattress-- 62 00:02:24,551 --> 00:02:24,689 it's like trying to sleep on broken coral. 63 00:02:27,034 --> 00:02:27,172 I'm going out of me mind. 64 00:02:28,379 --> 00:02:28,517 Ouch! 65 00:02:29,413 --> 00:02:29,551 Oh, me back. 66 00:02:30,586 --> 00:02:30,724 [ grumbling] 67 00:02:31,758 --> 00:02:31,896 Poor Mr. Krabs. 68 00:02:33,551 --> 00:02:33,689 What are we going to do, Squidward? 69 00:02:35,206 --> 00:02:35,344 Why do anything? 70 00:02:36,517 --> 00:02:36,655 I like the new Mr. Krabs-- 71 00:02:37,862 --> 00:02:37,965 he yells at you more. 72 00:02:39,137 --> 00:02:39,275 [ laughing] 73 00:02:40,413 --> 00:02:40,551 I'm serious, Squidward. 74 00:02:41,655 --> 00:02:41,793 So am I. 75 00:02:43,241 --> 00:02:43,379 We should get him a new mattress 76 00:02:44,655 --> 00:02:44,793 and surprise him with it. 77 00:02:46,413 --> 00:02:46,551 Then we'll never have to be late to work again. 78 00:02:48,482 --> 00:02:48,620 What?! 79 00:02:50,103 --> 00:02:50,206 You want me to spend my hard-earned money 80 00:02:52,448 --> 00:02:52,586 on my richer-than-me skinflint boss? 81 00:02:54,896 --> 00:02:55,000 No, thank you. 82 00:02:58,068 --> 00:02:58,206 That's okay, Squidward! 83 00:02:59,689 --> 00:02:59,827 You'll warm up to the idea. 84 00:03:01,862 --> 00:03:01,965 Thanks for coming with me, Patrick. 85 00:03:03,724 --> 00:03:03,862 No problem, buddy. 86 00:03:05,482 --> 00:03:05,620 I always wanted to go to a mattress store. 87 00:03:09,103 --> 00:03:09,241 Wow! Wow! 88 00:03:11,103 --> 00:03:11,241 I've never seen so many mattresses. 89 00:03:13,275 --> 00:03:13,413 Yeah. 90 00:03:14,827 --> 00:03:14,965 How many do you think there are? 91 00:03:21,275 --> 00:03:21,413 Ten. 92 00:03:22,206 --> 00:03:22,344 Cool. 93 00:03:23,793 --> 00:03:23,931 There's plenty more than that. 94 00:03:25,379 --> 00:03:25,517 Try 'em out-- find one you like. 95 00:03:26,689 --> 00:03:26,827 [ springs squeaking] 96 00:03:29,000 --> 00:03:29,137 [ air hissing] 97 00:03:31,482 --> 00:03:31,620 [ clanking] 98 00:03:33,413 --> 00:03:33,551 [ spluttering, imitating car engine] 99 00:03:37,172 --> 00:03:37,310 [ tires squeal, crashing] 100 00:03:43,172 --> 00:03:43,310 [ motor whirring] 101 00:03:48,344 --> 00:03:48,482 Ooh! 102 00:03:49,620 --> 00:03:49,758 [ laughing] 103 00:03:51,344 --> 00:03:51,482 [ SpongeBob and Patrick laughing] 104 00:03:54,655 --> 00:03:54,793 [ laughter continues] 105 00:04:00,655 --> 00:04:00,793 What are you morons doing?! 106 00:04:02,379 --> 00:04:02,517 Making a card for Mr. Krabs. 107 00:04:04,275 --> 00:04:04,413 To go with his new mattress. 108 00:04:06,379 --> 00:04:06,517 Oh, I see, you're just kissing up to the boss 109 00:04:09,448 --> 00:04:09,586 to make me look bad! 110 00:04:10,896 --> 00:04:11,000 Well, I won't stand for it! 111 00:04:12,379 --> 00:04:12,517 Give me that card! 112 00:04:13,931 --> 00:04:14,034 Hmm! Trying to outsmart me, will you? 113 00:04:16,034 --> 00:04:16,172 Ha-ha! 114 00:04:17,655 --> 00:04:17,793 There, I signed it for all of us. 115 00:04:19,137 --> 00:04:19,275 Hey, you didn't even help pay. 116 00:04:21,206 --> 00:04:21,344 Oh, that's okay. 117 00:04:22,586 --> 00:04:22,724 As long as Mr. Krabs is happy. 118 00:04:27,413 --> 00:04:27,551 KRABS: Oh, me back! 119 00:04:29,448 --> 00:04:29,586 Well, here goes another useless attempt 120 00:04:32,103 --> 00:04:32,241 to sleep on me mountainous, lumpy mattress. 121 00:04:34,965 --> 00:04:35,068 Argh! 122 00:04:36,551 --> 00:04:36,689 [ groaning] 123 00:04:38,344 --> 00:04:38,482 That's queer-- me mattress seems strangely cozy 124 00:04:41,379 --> 00:04:41,517 and... butter... like. 125 00:04:44,000 --> 00:04:44,103 [ snoring] 126 00:04:47,275 --> 00:04:47,413 ALL: Surprise! 127 00:04:48,862 --> 00:04:48,965 Armageddon! What? 128 00:04:49,931 --> 00:04:50,034 You? Oh! You? 129 00:04:51,896 --> 00:04:52,000 What in a blue-eyed scallop are you doing in me bedroom? 130 00:04:54,275 --> 00:04:54,413 We noticed how miserable you were 131 00:04:56,000 --> 00:04:56,103 on your lumpy, old mattress... 132 00:04:57,862 --> 00:04:57,965 So Isuggested we get you a new one. 133 00:05:00,655 --> 00:05:00,793 I thought it was your idea. 134 00:05:02,758 --> 00:05:02,896 So, where's me old mattress then?[ steam whistling] 135 00:05:05,379 --> 00:05:05,517 Don't worry, I took care of that personally, too. 136 00:05:08,206 --> 00:05:08,344 I had it hauled away to the dump. 137 00:05:10,000 --> 00:05:10,103 [ Krabs shouting] 138 00:05:12,275 --> 00:05:12,413 All... my... money was in that mattress! 139 00:05:15,965 --> 00:05:16,068 What?! 140 00:05:17,517 --> 00:05:17,655 Haven't you ever heard of a bank?! 141 00:05:18,896 --> 00:05:19,000 No! 142 00:05:20,689 --> 00:05:20,827 [ groaning, babbling] 143 00:05:24,931 --> 00:05:25,034 Mr. Krabs! 144 00:05:26,379 --> 00:05:26,517 No...! 145 00:05:28,310 --> 00:05:28,448 And we got you a card. 146 00:05:29,965 --> 00:05:30,068 Is there money in it? 147 00:05:31,034 --> 00:05:31,172 Nope. 148 00:05:32,172 --> 00:05:32,310 [ groans] 149 00:05:33,379 --> 00:05:33,517 [ siren wailing] 150 00:05:34,827 --> 00:05:34,965 [ tires squeal] 151 00:05:36,448 --> 00:05:36,586 SPONGEBOB: Is it serious, Doctor? 152 00:05:37,965 --> 00:05:38,068 Will Mr. Krabs be all right? 153 00:05:39,413 --> 00:05:39,551 Mr. Krabs is in a cash-coma. 154 00:05:41,655 --> 00:05:41,793 Only the return of his money can save his life. 155 00:05:44,310 --> 00:05:44,448 It was SpongeBob's fault! 156 00:05:46,310 --> 00:05:46,413 Getting Mr. Krabs a new mattress was hisidea! 157 00:05:49,068 --> 00:05:49,206 I knew it! 158 00:05:50,103 --> 00:05:50,241 Not so fast! 159 00:05:52,000 --> 00:05:52,103 This card says, "This was all my idea! Love, Squidward." 160 00:05:55,862 --> 00:05:55,965 If Mr. Krabs doesn't pull through, 161 00:05:58,241 --> 00:05:58,379 you're going to jail. 162 00:06:00,103 --> 00:06:00,241 Oh... you did this, SquarePants! 163 00:06:02,482 --> 00:06:02,620 If you don't get Mr. Krabs' mattress back, 164 00:06:04,862 --> 00:06:04,965 I am going to mur... 165 00:06:06,241 --> 00:06:06,379 [ policeman clears throat] 166 00:06:07,689 --> 00:06:07,827 [ laughing nervously] 167 00:06:09,620 --> 00:06:09,758 Help you do it myself. 168 00:06:12,000 --> 00:06:12,103 Wow, he really does care. 169 00:06:14,586 --> 00:06:14,724 PATRICK: What a dump. 170 00:06:16,517 --> 00:06:16,655 [ gate rattling] 171 00:06:18,103 --> 00:06:18,241 We've got to get in there, Squidward. 172 00:06:19,689 --> 00:06:19,827 Mr. Krabs is counting on us. 173 00:06:21,241 --> 00:06:21,379 PATRICK: SpongeBob, isn't that 174 00:06:22,689 --> 00:06:22,827 the mattress over there? 175 00:06:24,206 --> 00:06:24,344 Terrific, Patrick, you found it! 176 00:06:25,793 --> 00:06:25,931 What? Where? Let me see! 177 00:06:27,241 --> 00:06:27,379 Over there, Squidward, 178 00:06:28,896 --> 00:06:29,000 underneath that really big guard worm. 179 00:06:30,689 --> 00:06:30,827 [ worm growling, snoring] 180 00:06:32,241 --> 00:06:32,379 Oh, that figures. 181 00:06:35,689 --> 00:06:35,827 Oh, no! 182 00:06:36,896 --> 00:06:37,000 This is horrible. 183 00:06:38,068 --> 00:06:38,206 What is it, Doctor? 184 00:06:39,344 --> 00:06:39,482 This man has no insurance. 185 00:06:41,034 --> 00:06:41,172 He'll never be able to afford this room. 186 00:06:42,586 --> 00:06:42,724 You're right, nurse. 187 00:06:43,896 --> 00:06:44,000 Extract the patient, stat! 188 00:06:47,137 --> 00:06:47,275 [ Krabs groaning] 189 00:06:49,655 --> 00:06:49,793 SPONGEBOB: Well, that's Mr. Krabs' mattress all right. 190 00:06:52,586 --> 00:06:52,724 Let's go get it. 191 00:06:53,689 --> 00:06:53,827 Here's the plan: 192 00:06:55,000 --> 00:06:55,137 You two quietly go in there, 193 00:06:57,068 --> 00:06:57,206 remove the mattress out from under the guard worm 194 00:06:59,551 --> 00:06:59,689 without "waking the worm." 195 00:07:02,551 --> 00:07:02,689 Why not? 196 00:07:04,103 --> 00:07:04,206 Because that would be rude, Patrick. 197 00:07:05,862 --> 00:07:05,965 And nothing's meaner than a junkyard worm. 198 00:07:08,310 --> 00:07:08,448 He'll eat you alive! 199 00:07:09,620 --> 00:07:09,758 Hey, wait a minute. 200 00:07:10,896 --> 00:07:11,000 What are you going to do? 201 00:07:12,551 --> 00:07:12,689 Oh, I've got the most important job. 202 00:07:14,689 --> 00:07:14,827 I'm going to keep watch to make sure it's safe. 203 00:07:17,793 --> 00:07:17,931 Gee, thanks, buddy. 204 00:07:19,000 --> 00:07:19,137 My pleasure. 205 00:07:20,482 --> 00:07:20,620 Now let's get a move on. 206 00:07:23,068 --> 00:07:23,206 [ laughing] 207 00:07:25,448 --> 00:07:25,586 [ panting] 208 00:07:27,689 --> 00:07:27,827 Ah, isn't it beautiful, Patrick? 209 00:07:30,068 --> 00:07:30,206 SPONGEBOB: You can see everything from up here. 210 00:07:32,379 --> 00:07:32,517 PATRICK: Wow! 211 00:07:33,448 --> 00:07:33,586 [ sighs] 212 00:07:34,758 --> 00:07:34,896 What are you morons doing? 213 00:07:36,793 --> 00:07:36,931 Hey, Patrick, I think I can see our houses from here. 214 00:07:38,862 --> 00:07:38,965 PATRICK: Where? I can't see 'em. 215 00:07:41,172 --> 00:07:41,310 [ all shouting] 216 00:07:43,068 --> 00:07:43,206 Wow! Wow! 217 00:07:44,517 --> 00:07:44,655 [ laughing] 218 00:07:45,689 --> 00:07:45,827 Let's do it again! 219 00:07:47,448 --> 00:07:47,586 What did you idiots do? 220 00:07:49,137 --> 00:07:49,275 Squidward, what are you doing in there? 221 00:07:50,793 --> 00:07:50,931 You were supposed to keep watch! 222 00:07:52,620 --> 00:07:52,758 Yeah, and you woke up the guard worm, too! 223 00:07:54,862 --> 00:07:54,965 I didn't do it! 224 00:07:56,551 --> 00:07:58,793 You blockheads woke...[ worm growling] 225 00:07:58,793 --> 00:07:58,931 the... worm. 226 00:08:01,000 --> 00:08:01,137 [ Squidward screaming, fabric tearing, worm growling] 227 00:08:05,482 --> 00:08:05,620 DOCTOR: Doctor? 228 00:08:06,862 --> 00:08:06,965 DOCTOR 2: Yes, Doctor. 229 00:08:08,862 --> 00:08:08,965 Regarding your patient, I have come to this conclusion. 230 00:08:11,172 --> 00:08:11,310 Yes, go on. ! We have to remove him 231 00:08:12,862 --> 00:08:12,965 from in front of the candy machine 232 00:08:14,689 --> 00:08:14,827 so I can get to the Nutty-Nut Bar. 233 00:08:16,482 --> 00:08:16,620 Of course. Nurse! 234 00:08:17,586 --> 00:08:17,724 I'm on it. 235 00:08:23,689 --> 00:08:23,827 [ Krabs groaning] 236 00:08:29,655 --> 00:08:29,793 Worm Bait to Retriever, 237 00:08:31,241 --> 00:08:31,379 Worm Bait to Retriever, we're in. 238 00:08:32,620 --> 00:08:32,758 Out. 239 00:08:33,896 --> 00:08:34,000 Retriever to Worm Bait, 240 00:08:35,172 --> 00:08:35,310 stay in,don't go out. 241 00:08:36,482 --> 00:08:36,620 Understood. Out. 242 00:08:37,655 --> 00:08:37,793 No, in! Out. 243 00:08:39,034 --> 00:08:40,620 Understood. Out. 244 00:08:40,655 --> 00:08:42,689 SQUIDWARD: You're on the far side of the dump? 245 00:08:42,689 --> 00:08:42,827 Affirmative. 246 00:08:43,965 --> 00:08:45,000 Good, then make lots of noise 247 00:08:45,000 --> 00:08:45,137 to draw the guard worm 248 00:08:46,827 --> 00:08:46,965 away from the mattress so I can retrieve it. 249 00:08:48,310 --> 00:08:48,448 Affirmative. Out. 250 00:08:50,068 --> 00:08:50,206 Oh, that's why he calls himself the Retriever. 251 00:08:52,103 --> 00:08:52,241 Why are we called Worm Bait? 252 00:08:53,551 --> 00:08:53,689 I don't know. 253 00:08:54,689 --> 00:08:54,827 [ ululating] 254 00:08:55,689 --> 00:08:55,827 Oh, yeah. 255 00:08:56,931 --> 00:08:57,034 [ both ululating] 256 00:08:59,448 --> 00:08:59,586 Great idea, Patrick! 257 00:09:02,448 --> 00:09:02,586 [ ululating and banging] 258 00:09:04,206 --> 00:09:04,344 [ growling] 259 00:09:05,896 --> 00:09:06,000 And my perfect plan falls into place. 260 00:09:08,482 --> 00:09:08,620 [ laughing] 261 00:09:09,931 --> 00:09:10,034 [ ululating and banging] 262 00:09:11,793 --> 00:09:11,931 Uh, SpongeBob? 263 00:09:12,862 --> 00:09:12,965 Yes, Patrick? 264 00:09:14,793 --> 00:09:16,758 I think I know why our code name is Worm Bait. 265 00:09:16,758 --> 00:09:16,896 [ growling] 266 00:09:19,448 --> 00:09:19,586 [ stammering]: Nice worm. 267 00:09:21,206 --> 00:09:21,344 Good, kind, gentle worm. 268 00:09:23,586 --> 00:09:23,724 [ snarling] 269 00:09:24,724 --> 00:09:24,862 Ooh! 270 00:09:26,379 --> 00:09:26,517 [ panting happily] 271 00:09:28,344 --> 00:09:28,482 Oh, SpongeBob, he likes your wooden spoon. 272 00:09:31,241 --> 00:09:31,379 Huh? 273 00:09:34,275 --> 00:09:34,413 Wow, I think you're right, Patrick. 274 00:09:36,137 --> 00:09:36,275 See if he plays catch! 275 00:09:37,586 --> 00:09:37,724 Okay. 276 00:09:38,758 --> 00:09:38,896 See the stick, boy. 277 00:09:39,862 --> 00:09:39,965 Go get it, boy! 278 00:09:40,931 --> 00:09:41,034 [ barks] 279 00:09:42,034 --> 00:09:42,172 Coast is clear. 280 00:09:43,344 --> 00:09:43,482 Squiddy, you are a genius. 281 00:09:45,724 --> 00:09:45,862 Ouch! What the...? 282 00:09:47,068 --> 00:09:47,206 Hey, I needed a wooden spoon. 283 00:09:48,965 --> 00:09:49,068 I'll just keep it safe from harm in my back pocket. 284 00:09:52,103 --> 00:09:52,241 And now for the mattress. 285 00:09:53,827 --> 00:09:53,965 [ fabric rips, Squidward grunts] 286 00:09:55,310 --> 00:09:55,448 I should have guessed. 287 00:09:58,103 --> 00:09:58,241 [ Squidward screaming] 288 00:10:02,965 --> 00:10:03,068 Excuse me, Doctor. 289 00:10:04,551 --> 00:10:04,689 Administrator, what can I do for you? 290 00:10:05,896 --> 00:10:06,000 It has come to my attention 291 00:10:07,965 --> 00:10:08,068 that your patient, Mr. Krabs, is out on the front sidewalk. 292 00:10:10,482 --> 00:10:10,620 Yes. Yes, he is. 293 00:10:12,000 --> 00:10:12,137 What were you thinking, man? 294 00:10:13,620 --> 00:10:13,758 We're trying to run a business. 295 00:10:15,344 --> 00:10:15,482 We can't leave patients on the sidewalk. 296 00:10:16,655 --> 00:10:16,793 Not to worry. Nurse! 297 00:10:18,034 --> 00:10:18,172 I'm on it. 298 00:10:24,517 --> 00:10:24,655 What's the holdup?! 299 00:10:26,000 --> 00:10:26,137 SPONGEBOB: We feel silly! 300 00:10:28,344 --> 00:10:28,482 Come on, do it for old man Krabs. 301 00:10:30,620 --> 00:10:30,758 SPONGEBOB: Okay. 302 00:10:32,517 --> 00:10:32,655 Can you explain the plan again? 303 00:10:34,517 --> 00:10:34,655 Sure, but first, put on this cologne. 304 00:10:37,275 --> 00:10:37,413 Steak sauce? 305 00:10:40,206 --> 00:10:40,344 Okay, so you two are dressed as choice cuts. 306 00:10:43,827 --> 00:10:43,965 You go in there 307 00:10:45,310 --> 00:10:45,448 and yell "Trick or treat!" 308 00:10:47,379 --> 00:10:50,448 The worm will realize he forgot to stock up on Halloween candy, 309 00:10:50,448 --> 00:10:50,586 he'll leave to buy some, then we take the mattress. 310 00:10:53,379 --> 00:10:53,517 Give me that cologne. 311 00:10:56,172 --> 00:10:56,310 Now get in there! 312 00:10:57,827 --> 00:10:57,965 SPONGEBOB: Happy Halloween! 313 00:10:59,724 --> 00:10:59,862 I am notgoing to get hurt this time. 314 00:11:01,482 --> 00:11:01,620 [ rattling] 315 00:11:04,000 --> 00:11:04,103 What the...? 316 00:11:05,137 --> 00:11:06,206 Isn't that Mr. Krabs? 317 00:11:06,206 --> 00:11:06,344 [ screaming] 318 00:11:11,620 --> 00:11:11,758 [ growling] 319 00:11:13,275 --> 00:11:13,413 That guard worm doesn't look very happy. 320 00:11:15,448 --> 00:11:15,586 Run, Mr. Krabs! 321 00:11:16,827 --> 00:11:16,965 Run like you're not in a coma! 322 00:11:19,206 --> 00:11:19,344 [ sniffing] 323 00:11:20,517 --> 00:11:20,655 [ growling] 324 00:11:21,655 --> 00:11:21,793 It's... me money! 325 00:11:22,758 --> 00:11:22,896 [ snarling] 326 00:11:23,862 --> 00:11:23,965 [ growling] 327 00:11:25,000 --> 00:11:25,137 [ worm yelps] 328 00:11:26,034 --> 00:11:26,172 Oh, money! 329 00:11:27,793 --> 00:11:27,931 I promise I'll never leave you alone again. 330 00:11:29,379 --> 00:11:29,517 Hey, Mr. Krabs. 331 00:11:30,482 --> 00:11:30,620 [ barking] 332 00:11:31,758 --> 00:11:31,896 No, Mr. Krabs, it's us. 333 00:11:32,862 --> 00:11:32,965 Trick or treat. 334 00:11:34,034 --> 00:11:34,172 Oh, hey, SpongeBob. 335 00:11:35,310 --> 00:11:35,448 I didn't recognize you. 336 00:11:36,965 --> 00:11:37,068 Say, why are you two dressed as meat? 337 00:11:39,068 --> 00:11:39,206 Not just meat-- we're choice cuts. 338 00:11:41,172 --> 00:11:41,310 Right, Squidward? 339 00:11:42,379 --> 00:11:42,517 Oh, I give up. 340 00:11:43,965 --> 00:11:44,068 [ worm snarling] 341 00:11:45,103 --> 00:11:45,241 [ screaming] 342 00:11:46,482 --> 00:11:46,620 [ screaming and shouting] 343 00:12:01,448 --> 00:12:01,586 [ clam crowing like a rooster] 344 00:12:05,689 --> 00:12:05,827 [ sound like cloth tearing] 345 00:12:07,551 --> 00:12:07,689 And so passes another sleepless night 346 00:12:12,172 --> 00:12:12,310 haunted by my inability to steal even a single Krabby Patty. 347 00:12:18,448 --> 00:12:18,586 Maybe today will be the day. 348 00:12:20,655 --> 00:12:20,793 Thank you for your patronizing words, 349 00:12:23,620 --> 00:12:23,758 computer wife. 350 00:12:24,862 --> 00:12:24,965 Do you even have a plan? 351 00:12:26,517 --> 00:12:26,655 Plan, schman-- I'm going to wing it. 352 00:12:28,965 --> 00:12:29,068 What's the worst thing that could happen? 353 00:12:33,965 --> 00:12:34,068 I'm in. 354 00:12:35,586 --> 00:12:35,724 That was easy. 355 00:12:36,827 --> 00:12:36,965 Maybe today is the day 356 00:12:38,655 --> 00:12:38,793 I'm going to steal the Krabby Patty formula... 357 00:12:42,448 --> 00:12:42,586 [ screaming] 358 00:12:43,931 --> 00:12:44,034 Careful, I just mopped there. 359 00:12:45,275 --> 00:12:45,413 [ groans] 360 00:12:46,931 --> 00:12:47,034 Look at you, Plankton, 361 00:12:48,620 --> 00:12:48,758 Once again you've fallen flat on your back 362 00:12:51,310 --> 00:12:51,448 in another pathetic attempt to steal me formula. 363 00:12:54,241 --> 00:12:54,379 Though you tried and tried, 364 00:12:56,482 --> 00:12:56,620 you haven't had the smallest nibble 365 00:12:59,344 --> 00:12:59,482 of my delicious formula. 366 00:13:01,379 --> 00:13:01,517 And you never will! 367 00:13:02,758 --> 00:13:02,896 [ laughing] 368 00:13:04,068 --> 00:13:04,206 How do you sleep at night 369 00:13:05,724 --> 00:13:05,862 knowing you're a complete failure? 370 00:13:08,448 --> 00:13:08,586 There really should be a "Wet Floor" sign. 371 00:13:11,137 --> 00:13:11,275 Yeah, if that were me who slipped, 372 00:13:13,206 --> 00:13:13,344 I'd sue old man Krabs 373 00:13:14,586 --> 00:13:14,724 for all he's got. 374 00:13:16,310 --> 00:13:16,448 Does that include the Krabby Patty formula? 375 00:13:18,689 --> 00:13:18,827 Of course. 376 00:13:21,724 --> 00:13:21,862 Oh, the pain! 377 00:13:23,482 --> 00:13:23,620 I can't feel my arms and legs! 378 00:13:26,275 --> 00:13:26,413 I think they're broken. 379 00:13:28,413 --> 00:13:28,551 I'll have to sue for my pain and suffering. 380 00:13:31,344 --> 00:13:31,482 Sue?! 381 00:13:32,517 --> 00:13:32,655 Oh, that looks bad. 382 00:13:33,793 --> 00:13:33,931 Uh-oh. 383 00:13:34,896 --> 00:13:35,000 Poor little man. 384 00:13:38,965 --> 00:13:39,068 Hold up a second! 385 00:13:40,827 --> 00:13:40,965 Plankton, we don't need to drag this little incident 386 00:13:42,758 --> 00:13:42,896 into court, do we? 387 00:13:43,793 --> 00:13:43,931 Well... 388 00:13:45,586 --> 00:13:48,000 if you transfer the Krabby Patty formula to me, 389 00:13:48,000 --> 00:13:48,103 I'll forget your gross negligence. 390 00:13:50,068 --> 00:13:50,206 Scoundrel! 391 00:13:51,344 --> 00:13:51,482 You'll have my formula 392 00:13:53,000 --> 00:13:53,137 when you pry it from me lifeless claws! 393 00:13:54,551 --> 00:13:54,689 [ laughing sinisterly] 394 00:13:56,413 --> 00:13:56,551 See you in court, Krabs! 395 00:13:58,620 --> 00:13:58,758 Uh, I mean... 396 00:13:59,896 --> 00:14:00,068 Oh, the pain! 397 00:14:01,793 --> 00:14:01,931 The deep frying pain! 398 00:14:05,448 --> 00:14:05,586 I'm in a blue ruin. 399 00:14:07,344 --> 00:14:07,482 I'm doomed. 400 00:14:09,206 --> 00:14:11,689 Don't worry, Mr. Krabs, I will do whatever it takes 401 00:14:11,689 --> 00:14:11,827 to keep the Krusty Krab formula 402 00:14:13,448 --> 00:14:13,586 from getting into Plankton's evil hands. 403 00:14:15,896 --> 00:14:16,000 What I really need is a good lawyer. 404 00:14:18,000 --> 00:14:18,103 Hello, did somebody say "lawyer"? 405 00:14:19,724 --> 00:14:19,862 Richard A. Bottomfeeder, Attorney At Law. 406 00:14:22,206 --> 00:14:22,344 I couldn't help but notice that despicable display. 407 00:14:25,241 --> 00:14:25,379 So, uh, how much is this going to cost me? 408 00:14:27,689 --> 00:14:27,827 Actually, I won't charge you a dime unless we win. 409 00:14:30,000 --> 00:14:30,137 [ cash register dings] 410 00:14:31,689 --> 00:14:31,827 In fact, I think we should counter sue 411 00:14:33,793 --> 00:14:33,931 for everything Plankton owns. 412 00:14:35,448 --> 00:14:35,586 [ cash register dings] 413 00:14:37,137 --> 00:14:37,275 [ clanking] 414 00:14:38,517 --> 00:14:38,655 Does that happen a lot? 415 00:14:40,034 --> 00:14:40,172 No, they're usually silver. 416 00:14:41,172 --> 00:14:41,310 [ humming] 417 00:14:44,379 --> 00:14:44,517 Mr. Krabs? 418 00:14:45,482 --> 00:14:45,620 What is it, lad? 419 00:14:46,896 --> 00:14:47,000 Want to hear my testimony 420 00:14:48,689 --> 00:14:48,827 for when you call me as a character witness? 421 00:14:49,965 --> 00:14:50,068 I've been rehearsing it. 422 00:14:51,344 --> 00:14:51,482 Actually, SpongeBob, 423 00:14:53,068 --> 00:14:53,206 we won't be needing any testimony from you. 424 00:14:55,034 --> 00:14:55,172 Why, you'd be more of a... 425 00:14:56,724 --> 00:14:56,862 [ whispering] 426 00:14:58,172 --> 00:14:58,310 of a liability than an asset. 427 00:14:59,689 --> 00:14:59,827 But I... 428 00:15:00,862 --> 00:15:00,965 Now, run along-- 429 00:15:02,655 --> 00:15:04,172 make things shipshape for my victory celebration. 430 00:15:04,172 --> 00:15:04,310 I've got to get to the courthouse. 431 00:15:05,862 --> 00:15:05,965 There's only a few free parking places. 432 00:15:08,137 --> 00:15:08,275 Oh, this is going to be a slam dunk... 433 00:15:10,758 --> 00:15:10,896 [ screams] 434 00:15:12,000 --> 00:15:12,137 Oh, no! 435 00:15:13,551 --> 00:15:13,689 Mr. Krabs's lawyer! 436 00:15:15,137 --> 00:15:15,275 Speak to me! 437 00:15:16,310 --> 00:15:16,448 Wracked with pain... 438 00:15:18,000 --> 00:15:18,137 Can't move... 439 00:15:19,793 --> 00:15:19,931 But what about Mr. Krabs's case? 440 00:15:21,827 --> 00:15:21,965 Looks like you're going to have to handle this one, son. 441 00:15:24,586 --> 00:15:24,724 But I'm a... 442 00:15:25,931 --> 00:15:26,034 a liability. 443 00:15:27,655 --> 00:15:27,793 Everything you need to win... 444 00:15:28,931 --> 00:15:29,034 [ gasping] 445 00:15:30,137 --> 00:15:30,275 is in this here case. 446 00:15:32,793 --> 00:15:32,931 Really? Everything? 447 00:15:34,137 --> 00:15:34,275 Uh-huh, everything but a suit. 448 00:15:36,620 --> 00:15:36,758 A suit. 449 00:15:38,000 --> 00:15:38,103 Wonder where I could get a suit. 450 00:15:39,896 --> 00:15:40,000 [ The People's Court theme music plays] 451 00:15:44,965 --> 00:15:45,068 I'll give you one last chance. 452 00:15:49,000 --> 00:15:49,103 I'll drop the charges if you give me the formula. 453 00:15:52,586 --> 00:15:52,724 Never, you little whelp! 454 00:15:54,103 --> 00:15:54,206 [ crowd gasps] 455 00:15:55,310 --> 00:15:55,448 Ow, ow, my wittle arm! 456 00:15:58,482 --> 00:15:58,620 [ crowd gasps] 457 00:15:59,965 --> 00:16:00,137 What? No, I didn't lay a claw on him. 458 00:16:02,241 --> 00:16:02,379 Ow... my other arm! 459 00:16:05,344 --> 00:16:05,482 [ crowd gasps] 460 00:16:06,517 --> 00:16:06,655 He's lying! 461 00:16:07,862 --> 00:16:07,965 Bah! 462 00:16:09,275 --> 00:16:09,413 Court will come to order. 463 00:16:11,103 --> 00:16:11,241 The Honorable Judge Tickleback presiding. 464 00:16:12,758 --> 00:16:12,896 Mr. Krabs, where is your attorney? 465 00:16:14,413 --> 00:16:14,551 I don't know where he could be. 466 00:16:16,965 --> 00:16:17,068 [ crashing] 467 00:16:18,000 --> 00:16:18,103 Here I am! 468 00:16:19,724 --> 00:16:19,862 Thank you for joining us, Mister... 469 00:16:21,758 --> 00:16:21,896 SpongeBob Lawyerpants, Your Honor. 470 00:16:24,689 --> 00:16:24,827 [ softly]: What are you doing here, SpongeBob? 471 00:16:28,000 --> 00:16:28,103 Your lawyer, uh, fell down on the job. 472 00:16:30,000 --> 00:16:30,137 But don't worry, Mr. Krabs, I have everything under control. 473 00:16:33,103 --> 00:16:33,241 It's, uh, all in here. 474 00:16:34,379 --> 00:16:34,517 Really? 475 00:16:35,758 --> 00:16:37,931 Yup, right in... here... 476 00:16:37,931 --> 00:16:38,034 Is there a problem? 477 00:16:39,724 --> 00:16:39,862 Uh, your lawyer didn't give me the combination. 478 00:16:42,448 --> 00:16:42,586 Is the plaintiff ready to proceed? 479 00:16:44,620 --> 00:16:44,758 Yes, Your Honor, I'll try. 480 00:16:47,620 --> 00:16:47,758 Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. 481 00:16:51,655 --> 00:16:51,793 I wasn't always the tortured shell of a protozoa 482 00:16:56,310 --> 00:16:56,448 that writhes in pain before you today. 483 00:16:59,413 --> 00:16:59,551 I... was a vibrant carefree, happy-go-lucky single cell. 484 00:17:08,965 --> 00:17:09,068 Pull yourself together, boy. 485 00:17:10,931 --> 00:17:11,034 Then came the fateful day that I paid an innocent visit 486 00:17:15,241 --> 00:17:15,379 to the deathtrap known as the Krusty Krab. 487 00:17:18,413 --> 00:17:18,551 How's it coming, lad? 488 00:17:20,103 --> 00:17:20,241 Don't worry, Mr. Krabs, I'm on the case. 489 00:17:22,896 --> 00:17:23,000 Upon entering said establishment, 490 00:17:25,655 --> 00:17:25,793 I found myself without any warning 491 00:17:28,413 --> 00:17:28,551 slipping and finally falling onto a hard, unforgiving floor 492 00:17:33,551 --> 00:17:33,689 that had been intentionally covered 493 00:17:36,137 --> 00:17:36,275 with a vicious fluid. 494 00:17:38,793 --> 00:17:38,931 Bombs away! 495 00:17:42,758 --> 00:17:42,896 [ metal rattling] 496 00:17:44,000 --> 00:17:44,137 PLANKTON: Ahem! 497 00:17:45,275 --> 00:17:45,413 Are you quite finished? 498 00:17:46,275 --> 00:17:46,413 Mm-hmm. 499 00:17:47,344 --> 00:17:47,482 Where was I? 500 00:17:48,344 --> 00:17:48,482 Oh, yeah. 501 00:17:49,586 --> 00:17:49,724 But the worst part is... 502 00:17:51,862 --> 00:17:51,965 my dreams of completing a marathon, 503 00:17:54,655 --> 00:17:54,793 like I promised my old Grammy, have been dashed. 504 00:17:58,689 --> 00:17:58,827 [ sobbing] 505 00:18:00,931 --> 00:18:01,034 I'm sorry, Gram-Gram! 506 00:18:03,103 --> 00:18:03,241 [ sobbing] 507 00:18:04,137 --> 00:18:04,275 Sorry! 508 00:18:06,448 --> 00:18:06,586 [ all sobbing] 509 00:18:08,068 --> 00:18:08,206 Thank you for your kind attention. 510 00:18:11,034 --> 00:18:11,172 [ softly]: Suckers. 511 00:18:12,931 --> 00:18:14,758 Does the defense [ sobs] have an opening statement? 512 00:18:14,758 --> 00:18:14,896 Yes, Your Honor. 513 00:18:16,172 --> 00:18:16,310 Poor Gram-Gram! 514 00:18:18,862 --> 00:18:18,965 Mr. Krabs, can you identify this item? 515 00:18:22,172 --> 00:18:22,310 KRABS: It's a "Wet Floor" sign. 516 00:18:24,137 --> 00:18:24,275 Do you own one? 517 00:18:25,689 --> 00:18:25,827 Uh, well... um... 518 00:18:28,724 --> 00:18:28,862 No, I don't. 519 00:18:29,931 --> 00:18:30,034 [ jurors gasp] 520 00:18:31,482 --> 00:18:31,620 No, no, you don't understand! 521 00:18:33,655 --> 00:18:33,793 I had to make some tough business decisions 522 00:18:35,551 --> 00:18:35,689 and the sign seemed... superfluous. 523 00:18:38,000 --> 00:18:38,103 [ jurors murmuring "guilty"] 524 00:18:41,310 --> 00:18:41,448 No more questions. 525 00:18:43,103 --> 00:18:43,241 JUDGE: Your witness, Mr. Lawyerpants. 526 00:18:44,793 --> 00:18:44,931 Huh? 527 00:18:46,068 --> 00:18:46,206 Sometime today, Mr. Pants. 528 00:18:48,103 --> 00:18:48,241 May it please the court, ladies and gentlemen of the jury, 529 00:18:51,034 --> 00:18:51,172 my client has been called "cheap," "miserly," 530 00:18:54,000 --> 00:18:54,137 and "chronically tightfisted." 531 00:18:55,482 --> 00:18:55,620 Uh... um... 532 00:18:57,482 --> 00:18:57,620 But if he were as cheap as the prosecution claims he is, 533 00:19:02,068 --> 00:19:02,206 would he be able to sit there quietly 534 00:19:04,620 --> 00:19:04,758 while I took out a dollar and dropped it in the blender? 535 00:19:07,655 --> 00:19:07,793 [ gasps] 536 00:19:09,620 --> 00:19:09,758 [ blender whirring] 537 00:19:10,689 --> 00:19:10,827 No! No! No! 538 00:19:14,551 --> 00:19:14,689 Daddy's got you. Daddy's got you. 539 00:19:16,034 --> 00:19:16,172 Daddy's here. 540 00:19:18,000 --> 00:19:18,103 [ murmuring in disgust] 541 00:19:20,310 --> 00:19:20,448 Uh... 542 00:19:21,896 --> 00:19:22,000 A little glue, a little tape-- 543 00:19:23,310 --> 00:19:23,448 you'll be right as rain. 544 00:19:25,000 --> 00:19:25,103 Daddy didn't forget you. 545 00:19:27,241 --> 00:19:27,379 Uh... 546 00:19:28,931 --> 00:19:30,448 Does the defense have any witness to call? 547 00:19:30,448 --> 00:19:30,586 Yes, Your Honor. 548 00:19:32,034 --> 00:19:32,172 Defense calls... 549 00:19:33,310 --> 00:19:33,448 Squidward to the stand. 550 00:19:35,275 --> 00:19:35,413 Ah, Squidward, a loyal employee. 551 00:19:38,551 --> 00:19:38,689 SPONGEBOB: Mister, uh, Squidward is it? 552 00:19:40,965 --> 00:19:41,068 My client has been called "cheap." 553 00:19:42,758 --> 00:19:42,896 Would you agree with that ludicrous statement? 554 00:19:45,206 --> 00:19:45,344 Yes. 555 00:19:46,172 --> 00:19:46,310 What?! 556 00:19:47,310 --> 00:19:48,206 Allow me to rephrase 557 00:19:48,206 --> 00:19:48,344 the question. 558 00:19:49,896 --> 00:19:50,000 Can you tell the court of some instance 559 00:19:51,551 --> 00:19:51,689 of Mr. Krabs's generosity in any way? 560 00:19:52,793 --> 00:19:52,931 Nope. Can I go now? 561 00:19:54,862 --> 00:19:54,965 One day off in three years and I have to spend it testifying? 562 00:19:57,655 --> 00:19:57,793 [ jurors gasp; murmur in disgust] 563 00:20:03,275 --> 00:20:03,413 Must... open... case. 564 00:20:05,931 --> 00:20:06,034 So, it was youwho made the floor slippery, wasn't it? 565 00:20:11,137 --> 00:20:11,275 Answer the question! 566 00:20:13,068 --> 00:20:13,206 Need I remind you you are under oath? 567 00:20:14,862 --> 00:20:14,965 I'm doomed. 568 00:20:17,206 --> 00:20:17,344 You may as well give up on that case, me boy, 569 00:20:19,931 --> 00:20:20,034 my goose is cooked. 570 00:20:21,379 --> 00:20:21,517 [ gasps] 571 00:20:23,034 --> 00:20:23,172 Mr. Krabs, I'm surprised at you. 572 00:20:26,000 --> 00:20:26,137 We can't give up just because things look bleak. 573 00:20:30,103 --> 00:20:30,241 This trial will be won by what's in your heart, 574 00:20:33,241 --> 00:20:33,379 not what's in this dumb old case. 575 00:20:36,896 --> 00:20:37,000 It's open. 576 00:20:38,689 --> 00:20:38,827 It's... 577 00:20:40,586 --> 00:20:40,724 It's just his lunch. 578 00:20:42,000 --> 00:20:42,103 Or is it? 579 00:20:46,620 --> 00:20:46,758 Defense calls Plankton to the stand. 580 00:20:51,413 --> 00:20:51,551 Why did you go into the Krusty Krab that day? 581 00:20:54,137 --> 00:20:54,241 To, you know, say hello to my once-good-friend, Mr. Krabs. 582 00:20:58,241 --> 00:20:58,379 What? 583 00:20:59,896 --> 00:21:00,068 Are you sure it wasn't to make off 584 00:21:02,000 --> 00:21:02,137 with one of these?! 585 00:21:03,241 --> 00:21:03,379 [ sniffing] 586 00:21:06,482 --> 00:21:06,620 Gotcha. 587 00:21:08,103 --> 00:21:08,241 Weren't you there to steal the formula 588 00:21:11,172 --> 00:21:11,310 of the most delicious, sweet-smelling sandwich 589 00:21:14,310 --> 00:21:14,448 known to Bikini Bottom? 590 00:21:16,344 --> 00:21:16,482 Krabby Patty... 591 00:21:19,724 --> 00:21:19,862 [ groaning] 592 00:21:29,689 --> 00:21:29,827 I can't take it! 593 00:21:31,965 --> 00:21:32,068 Give me! 594 00:21:33,517 --> 00:21:33,655 Give me! Give me! Give me! 595 00:21:34,517 --> 00:21:34,655 Yippee! 596 00:21:36,517 --> 00:21:36,655 Finally it's mine! 597 00:21:38,448 --> 00:21:38,586 KRABS: I'll take that. 598 00:21:40,068 --> 00:21:40,206 Huh? 599 00:21:41,137 --> 00:21:41,275 No! No! No! 600 00:21:42,758 --> 00:21:42,896 Once again, Plankton, 601 00:21:44,793 --> 00:21:44,931 the sweetest of life's joys 602 00:21:46,413 --> 00:21:46,551 has eluded your grasp. 603 00:21:49,344 --> 00:21:49,482 No! No! No! No! 604 00:21:52,172 --> 00:21:52,310 Has the jury reached a verdict? 605 00:21:54,034 --> 00:21:54,137 We have, Your Honor. 606 00:21:55,655 --> 00:21:55,793 We find the defendant... 607 00:21:57,241 --> 00:21:57,379 not guilty! 608 00:21:59,310 --> 00:21:59,448 But he is cheap. 609 00:22:00,620 --> 00:22:00,758 Thank you, SpongeBob. 610 00:22:02,310 --> 00:22:02,448 I was foolish not to accept your help 611 00:22:03,517 --> 00:22:03,655 from the beginning. 612 00:22:04,793 --> 00:22:04,931 That's okay, Mr. Krabs. 613 00:22:06,000 --> 00:22:06,137 I made you a present. 614 00:22:07,172 --> 00:22:07,310 A present for me? 615 00:22:09,724 --> 00:22:09,862 Close your eyes and hold out your hand. 616 00:22:13,103 --> 00:22:13,241 [ groans in pain] 617 00:22:15,896 --> 00:22:16,000 SPONGEBOB: It's a "Wet Floor" sign. 618 00:22:17,448 --> 00:22:17,586 I made it myself. 619 00:22:18,586 --> 00:22:18,724 Well, it'll do. 620 00:22:19,827 --> 00:22:19,965 After all, it's free. 621 00:22:23,241 --> 00:22:23,379 Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH